Laidback Farewell Ideas for PCS Season

I have hosted and attended my fare share of formal farewells during our time in the Army. In many cases, they have their place. The Army, after all, really loves tradition and I generally enjoy a gathering with conversation and good food. A farewell in the military is the final gathering of a service member, friend, or spouse that you spent time with while at your current duty station or within a specific unit/organization. This year, I happen to be farewelling A LOT of my village (rude that you all are leaving, but ok). In the midst of brainstorming a farewell for my neighbor, I had a thought: “I am making this way too complicated and expensive on everyone, including myself.”

Like I said, I have hosted and attended formal farewells and they DO have their place. These ideas are in defense of the more casual farewells with people you did life with. Here’s why we need more chill farewells:

1. not everyone has the ability to get childcare
2. schedules are difficult to line up a night that everyone in your friend group is free (also, see #1)
3. not everyone wants a night out because moving is exhausting and stressful (especially if you are clearing on post housing!)
4. moving also means finances are tight
5. the person you are farewelling might have already shipped their HHG and clothes needed for night out.

Here are a few chill farewell ideas below:

1. Doughnuts and coffee playdate– buy a couple boxes of local doughnuts and brew a pot of coffee. Have everyone bring their own to-go mug with their flavoring already added to the mug. The kids can play off the sugar high while the you chat and pretend like you’re not about to hug your favorite neighbor for the last time in a long time.
2. The driveway meetup– “Hey neighbors, we are sending off the Jones family tonight in our driveway at 8PM. Bring a chair if you’d like to visit for a while.”
3. Bring a meal over during packing– We all know fast food meals don’t start when you are en route to your new duty location. They start when you are packing up your house! Offering to cook and bring over a meal for a friend who is PCSing is always greatly appreciated! Be sure to send over disposable plates and flatware.
4. Invite them over for a meal– base bestie already in the hotel? Great! make an easy casserole and sit on the couch together one more time.
5. Coffee shop meetup or stop by with coffee– caffeine is essential during the packing process. Sometimes you get that ideal coffee + sweet treat moment with your friend, and sometimes the experience needs to come to them!

To me it comes down this: we want the person we are farewelling to feel celebrated with the ability to relax, laugh, and sometimes cry. Taking the formality or overwhelm out of farewells can be a gift in itself. It is not always the amount spent, but the time spent that shows a person how much you mean to them. Do you have a special- but chill- farewell idea? I would love to hear about it in the comments!